(sung to the tune of The Sound of Silence)

Hello Kleenex, my old friend
I’ve come to blow you once again
While the pollen count was creeping
From my nose some crap was seeping
Some say the sound from my nose carries like a duck call
!@#$ you all
It’s the sound … of Tree Sex.

I took Benadryll too soon.
And now my head is a balloon.
All the trees are getting it on.
While I sneeze out my pollen song.
And the words on the box say “take only 2 a day”.
I OD’d last May.
On the sound … of Tree Sex.