After reading a terrible, horrible Vista review on a Windows review site, I can’t help but laugh at Vista-ish promises. And I’m not turning a blind eye. I want Vista to be good, just as Paul Thurrott said. He’s not bashing Vista. After all, winsupersite.com has to be pro-windows right? But it seems even the fanboys are not falling for it.

Why do I see a vaporware review on gamespot? What’s up with the blatant windows logo placement all throughout the article? I feel like I’m in Windows occupied Germany here! Why is this being featured right next to an Apple bootcamp article? “Oh, they’re being fair. Featuring a Windows story and a Mac story.” Yeah, fine. I’m all for fairness. But Vista isn’t out yet and Bootcamp is. Obviously, bootcamp is a pretty simple app compared to an entire OS. But again, to the ends of vaporware, I banish you gamespot. You are getting paid for this Vista feature. You are getting paid in a major way.

What do I say? What do all my friends say?

“I use XP for gaming. I only game on XP. The only reason I keep a PC around is for games. Without games, I wouldn’t have a PC. In all the things I do with my PC, there is very little that I do outside of gaming. I guess PC iz t3h game is what I’m trying to say.”

Yes. Great. So no wonder why Microsoft is sprinting to gamespot throwing money at them. It’s all so clear now. No one is buying your Xbox360 so you better start making false promises and Vista compatible banner ads. That way, people will wait a long time for Vista to deliver us from evil and dry up the revenue stream of AAPL. Except winsupersite.com didn’t bite. And neither am I.

When AAPL releases their Intel desktop, I’m buying one. It has WinFS on it. It’s called spotlight. Every time I write a file, the OS indexes it. So there’s no Windows search dog and a 5 minute wait. “Yes! Just what I wanted! I always wanted a companion when I’m searching for my .txt file with Bobby’s phone number in it!”

Hey! Where is that .zip I downloaded? Hrm, what feels natural … what should I tell the computer to do … give me an animated character! Everyone knows that cartoons search filesystems! O_o

Anyway, look at the gamespot picture up top. “If this is DirectX 9, imagine how Unreal Engine 3 games will look in DirectX 10.” This is the most stupid thing I’ll hear this month. Thanks gamespot. Now I know things can’t get any dum-ar. What a relief.

1. The graphics API has as much do to with how pretty a game looks as skin has to do with how pretty a person is. “Oh, but pretty people have skin!” Not relavent. DX10 can make games look nice, shiney with all kinds of fireworks but only if you design it that way. DX10 isn’t going to be something you type in: “enable_dx10=true! go!”, and then Quake4 starts blowing your mind.
2. This is juvenile. “The Dodge Viper has 500 horsepower. Imagine a car with a million horsepower! Wow!”
3. Like Hic said: showing off a game’s graphics is like bringing your dog’s hair to a dog show.

Group think is a bitch. Even if Vista completely sucks, everyone is still going to buy it. Because, that’s what we run at work. That’s what everyone else is using. Bill Gates is rich, he must be smart (actually he is smart .. but he’s lucky too). Everyone runs Windows so everyone runs Windows. Fine, run what you want. But wave your finger at Gamespot for stuffing their ears with Gates money.

Jesus fucking Christ, I’m choking on my own rage here.