I’ve invented a new programming language; I call it English. I’ll submit an official white papaer or something probably really important. Here’s a code snippet until I do something more important and official sounding. Bleep.

Make my OS stop freezing without reason.
After that, remove all stupid jokes from my Inbox.
If you have some free time while doing the two above:
- Download a bunch of porn while I'm at work
- Grab that album that I can't find off some server
- I don't care how you do it, just do the above, thanks.

It’s not funny so die.